First-Time Steroid User Starring in Internet Reality Series "Steroids Saved My Life"

Anabolic steroid users have prolifically posted online diaries outlining their protocols and results on various bodybuilding forums over the years. Some first time steroid users have also shared their experiences as well with some touting positive outcomes and others reporting disastrous experiences.

Peter Brown is a first time steroid user who shared his experience before the camera in the internet reality series "Steroids Saved My Life." The reality series (through its protagonist Peter Brown) effectively distills the basic motivations behind the typical individual who chooses to use anabolic steroids for non-medical purposes. Brown is neither a bodybuilder or an athlete and has no aspirations to become either. The project  delves directly into the motivations and the decision-making process that led to his use of steroids.

The "shockumentary" focuses almost exclusively on the positive aspects of anabolic steroid use. Anti-steroid crusaders are expected to be upset by the documentary; interestingly, those with pro-steroid sentiments have also been very critical of Peter Brown and his use of steroids. I asked Peter about this during my recent interview with him.

MESO: How long did you research anabolic steroids before beginning your cycle?

PB: Personally, I researched many different aspects of steroids and steroid use for approximately a month before we began filming. However, my trainer is very familiar with steroid use and his experiences and was a tremendous asset to me.

MESO: What specific sources of information did you use to develop your cycle?

PB: We consulted a number of websites, forums, along with current and ex-users of various forms of steroids before developing my current cycle. Also, we focused on creating a program first without the supplement of a steroid, and then added the steroid in as an enhancer.

MESO: How and why did you arrive at the chosen "low dose methodology"?

PB: My small amount of experience with weight training and nutrition contributed heavily to my "low dose methodology". Going on too high a dose, or stacking too much, would have likely been more of a detriment to my body than an asset because I probably wouldn't have been able to keep up with the rate my body was growing at. We kept it small and simple, focusing on proper exercising and dieting primarily, with the hope that the steroids would aid in enhancing my appetite, making my body recover at a much faster rate, and giving me more energy and strength in a faster time frame. Because of my slender body type and difficulty putting on mass naturally we didn't want to push things too fast and risk hurting me, and my Doctor agrees that keeping the low dosage will reduce potential risk while maintaining potential gains.

MESO: You mentioned Bigger Stronger Faster on Facebook. Did the steroid documentary influence your decision to use anabolic steroids? Did it influence your decision to make your steroid use the subject of an online reality series?

PB: It's funny, actually, because we heard of "Bigger, Stronger, Faster" a few weeks after we decided to move forward with the show and thought they were doing a similar thing, and in some ways they are, but in most aspects we have a different product. No, I wouldn't say that their film influenced my decision to take anabolic steroids because when I found out about it I had already made my commitment, but what it did do was give me a new sense of encouragement that we were on the right track about things. Similarly, it didn't have much affect on whether we were going the online route or not because we had already decided on that medium before we found out about their film.

MESO: You have been criticized for focusing on steroids as the primary tool for achieving your goals rather than attempting to gain muscle through proper nutrition and training alone. Even proponents of steroid use for bodybuilding purposes were critical of your decision to use steroids as the first step in your quest for physical transformation. Are these criticisms justified?

PB: I love the internet community, I really do, because they'll jump all over anything as soon as they see it. What they're doing is the equivalent of attacking a story-line in a television drama without seeing it fully through to the end in that they're only being shown a few pieces of the puzzle. We're not hiding the fact that we're filmmakers, and I think the internet is forgetting that. Let me be perfectly clear, I am not using steroids as the primary tool for achieving my goals, I am using it in addition to a proper workout routine, healthy diet, and active lifestyle. I most certainly understand people questioning my decision to being regularly working out five days a week at the same time as starting a steroid cycle, without having months or even years of gym-hours to build on. I think it depends on who you are and what situation you're in, however, because people can use steroids for any number of reasons at any point in their adult lives. What's best for one person might not be best for another, and I think people should be respectful of another persons predicament and not attack them without knowing all the facts.

MESO: You boldly discuss all of the great things that you expect steroids to do for you in the series. How did you arrive at these conclusions when the societal consensus is that steroids are dangerous/deadly when used for non-medical purposes? Do you still feel your expectations are realistic?

PB: I am willing to do what is necessary to prove my points, and I completely believe that in many situations the end justifies the means. The media holds so much power over our society, it's just unbelievable how many people are naive and misguided simply because they'll believe whatever the television tells them. I feel that most people's opinion of steroids comes from the world of pro-sports because use is considered cheating and we're taught cheating is wrong so everything just snowballs from that. Steroids are not a miracle drug. When I began my body-fat was between 6.5% and 6.8%, which is very unhealthy and concerning, but now we've worked up my body-fat to around 11.4% which is a significant improvement so far. My ideal weight is 180lbs, I mean, I'd love to be 220lbs with a great body and have a multi-million dollar NHL contract, but I don't think it's in the cards. Currently I am 158lbs, which is 20lbs more than when I began, so I have to be realistic about my weight. When the 12 weeks are up it looks like I'll be hovering solidly in the 165-170lbs range, and in significantly better health than I was 12 weeks prior, so that I can continue to build off that weight in the future towards 180lbs.

MESO: Do you think that anabolic steroids can be used safely in healthy individuals to increase muscle mass?

PB: I can't speak for everyone, but, for me the safe and cautious use of steroids is increasing muscle mass and contributing to making me a healthier and more fit individual. If a person feels that steroids are right for them, has done the proper research on it and is using in conjunction with the right diet and work out routine for their situation then, depending on what they're taking, steroids should build muscle mass effectively when used properly.

MESO: What type of reactions/feedback have you received? From friends? From people on the internet? Is the reaction what you expected?

PB: We have the distinction of being hated by just about everybody on both sides of the fence, and yet they're still watching. People against steroids attack us because of what steroids represent to them, and people who are for steroids attack us for not doing it "right". It doesn't end there either, I mean, I essentially get attacked about everything about me personally. It's amazing, it really is, and I absolutely love it. For some people, it's fear of what they don't understand, and the natural mode of discourse is to attack it to make it seem like we are doing something very wrong, and on the other hand for some other people it's trying to be superior and trying to say I'm doing it "wrong" because it's not the way they did it. Basically, most everyone is trying to make us out to be the bad guys, and I'm fine with that, because sometimes the bad guy is right. However, there is a small percentage of folks out there on the internet who have been amazingly supportive and very much side with my choice. We have received a handful of e-mails from guys who are in similar situations as I am in and are very eager to find out the results of this experiment and they commend me for taking such a huge step, calling me an "inspiration" to skinny guys everywhere. I've received a mixed reaction from many of my friends, but I always emphasize the importance of it being used to help me get healthy and fit and find that nay-sayers usually come around. My family has been tremendously supportive, knowing my history better than anyone, they're relieved and thankful that I'm finally trying to overcome a lifelong struggle. Truthfully, the reactions we have gotten are more or less exactly what we expected, and it's almost boring to an extent for me because I tire of reading the same old insults and disrespectful comments over and over. People say we "can't fool them by saying steroids are okay", well to that I say that "we might not be able to convince you that sometimes steroids can be okay, but the media sure has you convinced that they're always not okay."

MESO: Any regrets as the wrap up your first steroid cycle?

PB: No, I have no regrets of this steroid cycle at this point in time. However, I love being at the gym, so I consider it unfortunate that I missed so much enjoyable time in that environment before we started the show, but, if it wasn't for the psychological incentive of the steroids I would have likely missed out on even more gym time and likely have continued to barely go at all. Not only has my body changed for the better, but the way I think has also changed in that I'm much more conscious of taking care of my body with eating, training, and being active for the rest of my life. I feel that I'm a much more confident and well-rounded individual now.

MESO: How much thought have you given to what will happen after the conclusion of your steroid cycle? E.g. post cycle therapy, training/eating to maintain gains, future cycles?

We already have a plan in place for PCT after the 12 weeks conclude, and I will continue to visit regularly with my Doctor to make sure I'm in good health. It would be rather stupid of me to stop working out and eating right after the cycle is complete, so obviously I'll continue to maintain the proper diet I have developed, and keep up a regular work out schedule to maintain and improve my gains. As far as further cycles are concerned, at the current time I have no plans of cycling again in the immediate future, but most certainly do not count it out at some point down the road. After we conclude everything in the 12 episode Season 1, we will continue to update people on my progress and condition in Season 2, however, unlike Season 1 we won't be releasing them on a weekly basis, they will be more spaced-out. The cycle itself is clearly important, it's what you do afterwards that can be considered just as important so we want to show people that as well!

About Peter Brown

Peter is a recent graduate of the Vancouver Film School, and is looking to pursue a filmmaking career, focusing on writing and directing. He is the star of the internet reality series "Steroids Saved My Life."